A Lover's Quarrel
by Red XII
Summary: It's your basic FF7 love triangle with just a little bit of a twist...
1. Who Was With Who?

"A Lover's Quarrel"

Chapter 1

(Tifa and Aeris enter)

Tifa: Give it up Aeris! The only reason he even bothers to talk to you is just to be nice! He doesn't want to hurt your feelings so he cloaks his own intentions in a facade of fake smile and lies!

Aeris: He does not! He loves me! You just can't believe for one second that he and I actually have something. Something that makes you so jealous that you curl up in your little bed every night and cry yourself to sleep!

Tifa: I do not!

Aeris: Well then how come he went on a date with me when we were at the Gold Saucer!

Tifa: What on Earth are you talking about?! He went on a date with me!

Aeris: Um, Tifa how is that even possible if I was with for all but a few hours, during which hours Cloud was just sleeping.

Tifa: Aeris who do you think you are fooling, the only person you are lying to is yourself because I sure as Hell don't believe you!

(Cloud enters)

Tifa & Aeris: Cloud!

Cloud: Um, hi…

Tifa: Okay Cloud you remember our date at the Gold Saucer right? It was just the two of us (she glares at Aeris) side by side the entire night. It was so romantic, almost to good to be true…

Aeris: That's because it isn't true! Cloud was with me! Remember honey, we went on that tour ride, and it was so high that we could see the entire place. It was just breath taking….

(Aeris and Tifa both standing in a daydreaming daze, as Cloud stares at them with utter confusion)

Cloud: Um, to be quite honest, I don't remember being with either of you that night.

Aeris & Tifa: WHAT?!?!

Cloud: Yeah, to be honest that entire night is a complete blur.

Aeris: Cloud, how could you forget me?! I thought we had something together… I… I thought you loved me

(Aeris' eyes well up with tears and she runs off crying and slams a door behind her)

Tifa: You really mean it… You don't remember one minute of it? (Cloud shakes his head)

Cloud: Sorry

Tifa: How could you! You pig, I gave you all my love and you can't give me the common decency of remembrance! I need comfort food! Where's the Chocolate chip Cookie Dough!

(Tifa runs off in a similar tear filled rage and slams the door behind her)

(Cloud scratches his head)

Cloud: Women? I just don't get them.

(Muffled voice): Are they gone yet?

Cloud: Yep, you can come out now.

Vincent: So do you think we should tell them or-

Cloud: I don't care! As long as I'm with you nothing matters.

(Cloud reaches over and pulls Vincent close into a lovers embrace. To put it bluntly, they're lip wrestling)

Vincent: But, don't you think they have a right to know?

Cloud: What does it matter, all I care is that I love you and want to be with you forever.

Vincent: Oh Cloud…Say you'll never change.

Cloud: I love you Vincent, always.

(they stumble out the door while exchanging saliva)


	2. You Can't keep Everyone Happy

"A Lover's Quarrel"

Chapter 2

(Aeris and Tifa are sitting on a couch covered with blankets watching "Bridges of Madison County", and other assorted chick flicks. They are surrounded by mounds of opened and partially used "Hagen-Das" ice cream containers. We continue our story as we listen in on the two as they wallow in self pity.) 

Aeris: I can't believe he did that, how could he just toss our precious memories a side like a used condom.

(Tifa stares back at Aeris in wide eyed confusion)

Tifa: Like a used condom?!?!

Aeris: Sorry I'm just thinking of Cloud, he's so cute even if he is a jerk. And Harrison Ford is kinda hot, by the way pass me the Mint Chocolate Chip.

(Tifa is still staring wide eyed and surprised)

Tifa:Like a used condom?!?!

Aeris: Sorry, bad metaphor.

Tifa: Horrible metaphor is more like it! Used condom…. Eeeeww!

Aeris: Oh shut, up and pass me the Cookies in Cream

Tifa: Fine, just no more metaphors. Oh, yeah do we have any chocolate chip cooking dough left?

Aeris: Nope, I ate it. Sorry.

Tifa: Aeris you pig that was an entire container.

Aeris: I know but without food how am I supposed to eat away my own self misery?

Tifa: Good point. Hand me the Snickers & Fudge instead.

(Aeris tosses her a half full container)

Aeris: Now quiet down I can't hear what they're saying.

(We now come to a different room where Vincent and Cloud are sitting and watching the movie "The Full Monty")

Cloud: You know I think I really hurt Aeris and Tifa back there, apparently they really had something for me.

Vincent: Well, they're just going to have to tough it out, because it's mine turn now and I'm keeping you all to my self. (Vincent pulls Cloud closer as the two snuggle on their couch)

Cloud: You know this movie would be a whole lot better if they could get some decent looking men in it.

Vincent: I don't know I think that ones kinda cute. (He gestures to the TV)

Cloud: The blond one?

Vincent: Yeah, he just has this interesting charismatic charm that to be quite honest makes him kinda cute.

Cloud: I don't know, he's a little scrawny…

Vincent: Muscle doesn't matter, take you for example…

Cloud: Hey!

Vincent: Kidding, you know you're my big hunk of man. But, lets be honest you're no pro wrestler.

Cloud: I bet I could beat you in a wrestling match…

Vincent: Oh yeah…

(They eye each other seductively)

Cloud: Yeah…

Vincent: Bring it on tough guy…

Cloud: I'll show you!

(Cloud tackles Vincent onto one side of the couch and begins tickling him playfully)

Vincent: Hey no fair!

Cloud: What?

Vincent: No… hahaha…. Tickling…..hahaha *snort* hahaha…..aloud!

Cloud: Well how about this then.

(Cloud leans forward engaging Vincent in a passionate kiss)

Vincent: Yeah, I think I'll allow that…

(Cloud reaches up and dims the light as the scene gets a little more interesting…)

Okay guys give me a little more feedback, write some reviews and tell me what ya think. Thanks again, bye J


	3. I'm so Confused

Enter Barret and RedXIII casually strolling down a central 7th. Heaven blvd.)   
Barret: I'm tellin ya, it's pronounced "tom A to"   
RedXII: No, no, and no a third time you insolent fool, it's correctly, and much more elegantly might I add, pronounced "Tom-a-to". The "a" is much less dominant.   
Barret: You @$%@$% little #@^@$%!!! You can't even figure out how to say a #%#@ vegetable!   
RedXIII: Oh you poor simpleton, you don't even realize that a tom-a-to is a fruit and not a vegetable.   
Barret: $%@$$%^ you blasted @#^%@%@! A Tom-A-to is a #@#%^ vegetable, I'm mean even a little red doggy-tigery thing like you figure that blasted #^?$% thing out!   
RedXII: Oh Barret, how I envy your idiocy at times, ignorance for you must be shear bliss.  
Barret: %$&%&&^%* of a &$%^&^%#^?%&^$% you little &$^@%^& why I  
oughta ^(^$^%&!!!   
(Enter Cid stumbling out of a near by pub)   
Cid: Hey you guys! Come ere ya #%@$ son's a $^$#%^   
(At this point the author decided to unrealistically edit the story for moral content)   
Barret: Huh?   
Cid: what'd he say   
RedXIII: He's saying that if you two profane ignoramuses don't shut your yaps, you will be eliminated from the space time continuum of this story.   
Cid & Barret: That's a load of $@#^@#^!   
(Suddenly a bolt of lightning is emitted from the heavens to smite Barret and Cid, two piles of ashes now lay where they once stood)   
RedXIII: Wow, I guess "Big Brother" is always watching... (If you haven't read the Orson Wells novel "1984" this joke probably makes no sense to you, there there, some of us just aren't as gifted with the knowledge of higher literature I guess...)   
  
::Cloud and Vincent come strolling down the opposite side of the street (no pun intended) laughing and smiling with arms around each other regaling about the movie they had just seen, Billy Eliot::   
Cloud: I love that little guy!   
Vincent: He was so cute!   
Cloud: Yeah, like the little fluffy teddy bear kind of cute.   
Vincent: Do you think he was gay in the end, you know when he kissed the other little boy on the cheek?   
Cloud: You mean the cross-dressing one?   
Vincent: yeah   
Cloud: Of course, he was way too cute to be straight.   
Vincent: That means nothing though, besides he said at that other part that he wasn't a "puff"   
Cloud: Well of course he's not a puff, but that doesn't mean he can't be a gay guy.   
::Vincent and Cloud smile to each other, as RedXIII walks up to greet them::   
RedXIII: So I see you guys are being a little more out with the whole relationship thing then?   
Cloud: Pretty much  
Vincent: Why bother hiding it ::he hugs Cloud::  
RedXIII: ::Raises and eyebrow:: okay guys, don't think I'm being in anyway closed minded, but could you please not be so obnoxiously loving in public, it makes those of us with weak stomachs quite nauseous.  
::Cloud and Vincent look at each other and shrug, Cloud leans over to Vincent and whispers something into his ear, Vincent laughs and nods::  
RedXIII: What? ::his voice peaking with curiosity::  
Cloud: Oh nothing  
Vincent: Don't worry your pretty little head about it. ::he smiles in his most belittling manor::  
RedXIII: You guys really worry me at times, you know that...  
Vincent:: There there...  
Cloud: Is the widdle kitty lonely  
Vincent: How bout we give it a big huggy wuggy  
RedXIII: huggy wuggy???  
Cloud: huggy wuggy???  
Barret & Cid: Huggy Wuggy???  
RedXIII: I thought you two were dead  
Barret: %&$#% foo!  
Cid: Why would you #%@#^@ think that we were @%^$@% dead?!  
::Suddenly a large Wonder Bread truck falls from the sky landing on and killing Cid and Barret::  
RedXIII: Strangely enough that was semi-expected....  
Cloud: hey Red, I have one question.  
RedXIII: What?  
Cloud: Has there been any point to this scene at all?  
RedXIII: Good question.  
Yuffie: I think it's basically just been a remedial hosting of quick cheap laughs, bad jokes, and expected prat falls.  
(ouch, that was harsh....)  
Cloud: Yeah.  
Vincent: I'm afraid the author is suffering from writer's block at the moment.  
Yuffie: What makes you say that?  
Vincent: Because for some reason you just appeared out of the blue, where the hell did you come from?!  
Yuffie: I don't know, I was sitting at home and the last thing I remember is... Actually I can't remember anything before last night.  
RedXIII: What happened last night?  
Yuffie: Why do you ask?  
RedXIII: Because with the way you stated that it kinda makes us think it has something to do with your dazed and confused state.  
Cloud: ::whispers:: She probably went on another drinking binge...  
Yuffie: What did you say?  
Cloud: Um... what did who say?  
Yuffie: You  
Cloud: What about me?  
Yuffie: You just said something.  
Cloud: I did?  
Yuffie: Yeah  
Cloud: What did I say?  
Yuffie: I don't know that's why I asked.  
Cloud: Weren't you listening?  
Yuffie Yeah but... Oh I give up...  
Vincent: Ow...  
RedXIII: My head hurts...  
Cloud: Okay I think we've all had enough of this...  
Vincent: You're telling me...  
Yuffie: Hey have you guys seen Tifa or Aeris lately?  
Cloud & Vincent: Ummm...  
  



	4. Momentary Moral Dilema

A Lover's Quarrel: Part IV  
  
(We pick up on our heros about where we left off last)  
  
Cloud: You guys haven't said anything, you know, about us ::gestures to Vincent:: to Tifa or Aeris have you?  
  
Red XIII: No, we're not that masochistic  
  
Yuffie: Yeah, that sounds like a smart idea, "hi, Tifa, your boy toy? Well, the only reason he doesn't want you is because he's found something else. No, not as much someone else, as much as he kinda doesn't play on your team anymore. He switched sides."  
  
Red XIII: Switched sides?  
  
Yuffie: You know, "he bats for the other team".  
  
Red XIII: Oooooh.  
  
Cloud: Um, guys?  
  
Red XIII: Sorry, Cloud, long story short though no we haven't said anything.  
  
Cloud: Good, because I was wondering if you-  
  
Yuffie: We also should mention that there is no was in Hell that we're going to tell either of them.  
  
Cloud: Why not?! Please!!!  
  
::Red XIII and Yuffie both break into laughter::  
  
Cloud: What's so funny?  
  
Red XIII: Well, in a matter of speaking, though one never should, one always kills the messenger.  
  
Cloud: Huh?  
  
Yuffie: He means Tifa would probably pummel the first thing in sight upon finding out that her childhood crush is and has been totally out of reach. Aeris on the other hand, probably will take this a little better.  
  
Red XIII: Really? You think so?  
  
Yuffie: Oh yeah, she's generally the calm type with this kind of news  
  
Red XIII: I don't know, she seems all sweet and innocent, but I'm telling you, the girl has a wild side. I mean she was mainly raised on the streets so you know she has that little twig inside her that you know is just fragile enough that it doesn't break often, but when it snaps, so does she.  
  
Cloud: Little twig?  
  
Red XIII: Okay, so the analogy with a bit of a shot in the dark, point is still sustained though.  
  
Cloud: And that would be?  
  
Vincent: I think you're skrewed.  
  
Red XIII: Precisely.  
  
Cloud: Well I'm glad you're all so supportive and helpful...  
  
Yuffie: Oh we're supportive all the way, we just aren't gonna be helpful  
  
Red XIII: You're a good friend Cloud, but I'm afraid you haven a friend altruistic enough to save you from the women you've scorned.  
  
Everyone else: huh?  
  
Red XIII: What he said, you're skrewed.  
  
Cloud: Well maybe they don't have to know right away. I mean, maybe giving them time will soften the blow.  
  
Vincent: You mean delaying honesty for the sake of what the don't know won't hurt them?  
  
Cloud: Sure.  
  
Vincent: I don't know, maybe it's just me but I think this is probably one of the better scenarios for the two of them. Tifa and Aeris I mean, as friends.  
  
Red XIII: I'm afraid I don't follow.  
  
Yuffie: Hmm, good point. If Cloud went for either Tifa or Aeris, then no matter what one of them was going to end up resenting the other. Usually people don't stay close friends after something like that.  
  
Red XIII: I see what you're getting at. So basically if Cloud were straight he'd be as assumed doomed to the paradox of pleasing only one girl while disappointing the other, or visa versa, hence the paradox.   
  
Yuffie: I think they got it before you vomited up the dictionary.   
  
Red XIII: wench.  
  
Yuffie: androgynous cat-dog.  
  
Red XIII: I'm not androgynous!   
  
Yuffie: What ever you say ma'am.  
  
Red XIII: Immature klepto twit...  
  
Yuffie: Kitty's goin down!  
  
Red XIII: Bring it my pre-pubesent little curmudgeon...  
  
Yuffie: No making up words!  
  
Red XIII: I didn't.  
  
Yuffie: Fatty.  
  
Red XIII: What did you say?!?!  
  
::Red launches at Yuffie as the two of them tumble over one another wrestling, biting, and clawing each other::  
  
Cloud: Should we do something?  
  
Vincent: No, no, just let them get it out of their system  
  
Cloud: Seriously though, why can't you just tell them?  
  
Vincent: Me? Are you completely mad?  
  
Cloud: Why not, you should feel at least a little responsible for crushing their dreams. ::he smiles and wraps his arms around Vincent's waist::  
  
Vincent: Crushing their dreams? More like disillusioning them. ::He playfully pokes at Cloud::  
  
Vincent: Either way, what would I say, "Hi, yeah um, I'm sure why I didn't tell you sooner but I've been boinking Cloud and that's we he won't settle for either of you ladies. But if it makes you feel any better, I'm not another woman."?  
  
Cloud: Well I probably wouldn't use the term boinking, but replace that with something like "satisfying" or "keeping company" and sure that'll work.  
  
Vincent: Hmm, yeah, still not gonna do it though.  
  
Cloud: Worth a shot.  
  
::Panting from exaustion Yuffie and Red XIII break from fighting to catch their breaths::  
  
Vincent: You're going to have to face up to it eventually, you've gotta tell them.  
  
Red XIII: Are we still on this? Geez man, grow some balls and just do it.  
  
Cloud: Hey! I have balls!  
  
Red XIII: Of course you do...  
  
Yuffie: I don't know why you care this much, I mean, if you really want them to find out that bad but don't wanna tell them why don't you just "let them find out on their own"?  
  
Red XIII: Oh mother of mercy...  
  
Cloud: What do you mean?  
  
Yuffie: You mean the thought hadn't occurred to you that you could just set something up so that you'd know they'd see you two "together" from like a distance or something, close enough to figure things out without question. But, at the same time at a distance enough to keep their reaction, whatever they maybe, of sorts "hidden" from you.  
  
::Cloud's eyes are wide and he is silent::  
  
Vincent: I don't know if I like that idea.  
  
Red XIII: ::to Yuffie:: You're a bad person, you know that right?  
  
::Yuffie sticks her tongue out and makes a childish smushed-up face towards Red XIII::  
  
Red XIII: Oh yeah, you'll find a guy any day now...  
  
Yuffie: At least I'm not the spawn of drunken cat on dog lovin', genetic project my ass...  
  
Red XIII: We're an ancient almost exstinct species, not lab projects!  
  
Cloud: What's wrong with being a genetic lab project?   
  
Red XIII: I'm not one.  
  
Cloud: So they're just inferior?  
  
Red XIII: I didn't say that, but yes, since all of Hojo's work was the result of some sort of foolish Jenova high, yeah I'd have to say they were all failures.  
  
Cloud: ::Cloud's eyes darken and his brows lower:: Ever had your own tail crammed down your throat by a failure...  
  
Red XIII: I... uh...  
  
Yuffie: oh this should be good...  
  
::Cloud reaches for his sword::  
  
::Vincent shakes his head and smiles::  
  
Vincent: Hi Tifa.  
  
::Cloud yelps and quickly jumps behind Red XIII and cowers in fear::  
  
Red XIII: Clever, and very appreciated.  
  
Yuffie: Ah crap, you couldn't have waited like maybe a minute first...  
  
Cloud: ::Poking his head up from behind Red XII:: Hey, I don't see Tifa...  
  
Vincent: Sorry about that dear, but the SPCA's been on us all week, I can't let you kick the puppy. ::leans over and kisses him on the cheek::  
  
Cloud: But I wasn't gonna hurt him much, and you scared me... ::Cloud's unhappy frown of a face becomes a pitiful puppy dog like expression::  
  
Vincent: Aw, I'm sorry, come here. ::He hugs Cloud::  
  
::Red XIII and Yuffie look on in quiet empathetic happiness for about 5 seconds... unfortunatly the cuteness quickly fades as gentle and sweet hugging, moves from caress, to more sensual massaging and touching::  
  
Red XII: ::wide-eyed:: um... guys.... guys...   
  
Yuffie: ::pausing for a moment to contemplate the guy on guy action,:: hmm, you know, in a way, it's kinda hot.  
  
Red XIII: Guys Tifa and Aeris are right over there!  
  
::But they both pay no attention to him::  
  
::Yuffie glances over in the direction Red XII gestured::  
  
Yuffie: Holy crap! It's them!  
  
::Red XIII looks in the same direction, confused by Yuffie's overplaying into his attempt to stop boy play time. Tifa and Aeris are about three blocks away chatting with one another so far oblivious to the situation::  
  
Red XIII: I'll be a monkey's uncle...  
  
Yuffie: And a cat's, and a dog, hell why don't you throw a cow in the family tree too.  
  
::No response::  
  
::Yuffie turns back to see Red XIII running in the opposite direction, already a good distance away. Cloud and Vincent still remain in their own world...::  
  
Yuffie: Hey! Wait up, I'm not getting stuck in this! ::She darts off after Red XIII leaving Cloud & Vincent and Tifa & Aeris to fate::  
  
  
  
Author's Note: Alright, this concludes chapter 4, sorry about leaving things on such a suspenseful note, but I gotta have something to work with. Cya later sports fans ;) 


	5. He Was Choking

A Lover's Quarrel: Part 5  
  
"He was Choking..."  
  
::Cloud and Vincent sit making out about two blocks away from Tifa and Aeris, who both happen to be walking in their direction. Neither party noticing each other so far, they go about what they were doing::  
  
Tifa: Okay, so I know it looks just like everything else I wear, but this new white top is just trey sheik!  
  
Aeris: ...tre sheek?  
  
Tifa: Must you question everything I say?!  
  
Aeris: I'm just saying, that ugly bar rag shirt doesn't really help you, now if you'd just try those new leather pants on I got you to buy...  
  
Tifa: I mean you honestly question everything... and I like these shorts, leather chafes me.  
  
Aeris: What's wrong with questioning stuff?  
  
Tifa: Aeris, learn to just accept, don't question.  
  
Aeris: ...::slightly under her breath:: lessons on how poor widdle tifa can deal with reality...  
  
Tifa: Hmm?  
  
Aeris: I was just saying that if you want to deal with all the formality, that's fine.  
  
Tifa: That's not what you said, what did you say? ::her voice slightly angry::  
  
Aeris: ::Her eyes widen and her mouth drops:: well color me... wow...  
  
Tifa: Color what? You're not focusing! What did you say?! ::waves a hand in her face:: Mission control to Aeris, you there kid?  
  
::Tifa turns to see what Aeris is of sorts gawking oddly at::  
  
Tifa: Sweet Holy Mother!  
  
::At this point Vincent blinks an eye open to notice the two girls starring wide eyed in disbelief. His first reaction being both of surprise and laughter, he loses slight control of his motor skills in what result as sort of a snort while kissing Cloud::  
  
Cloud:...Um, honey, what was that?  
  
Vincent: ::Wide eyed and coldly:: Turn around.  
  
Cloud: Excuse me?!  
  
Vincent: Do it  
  
::Cloud shakes his head and begins to comply::.  
  
Cloud: You know, you just get so aggressive- ::he notices Aeris and Tifa standing next to him still not moving, speaking, or blinking...::  
  
Cloud: Um... uh... Hi guys.  
  
Tifa: What.  
  
Aeris: Wow.  
  
Vincent: ::sigh::  
  
::Yuffie and Red XIII perched on an overhanging rooftop fall over laughing uncontrollably::  
  
Red XIII: Oh wait, shh shh, he's gonna say something.  
  
::both attempt to stifle their laughter::  
  
Cloud: See I really wanted to tell you guys but...  
  
Tifa: How.  
  
Aeris: Wow.  
  
Tifa: Why?  
  
Aeris: Wow.  
  
Tifa: You're?! ...that means... he's?! ...but, no, and yet... wow...  
  
Aeris: yeah...  
  
Tifa: And yet it explains so much...  
  
Aeris: kinda... Especially the hair.  
  
Cloud: My hair?  
  
Tifa: Yeah, I always thought he was a little too pretty.  
  
Cloud: Do I have gay hair?  
  
Vincent: ::rolling his eyes:: yes, you have homosexual hair...  
  
Aeris: I think it's cute.  
  
Cloud: Well I guess it is kinda cute... ::runs his fingers through his hair::  
  
Yuffie: ::yelling from a distance:: not your hair moron! She's trying to be nice about you and vamp-boi.  
  
Red XIII: how does the word boy sound different from boi?  
  
Yuffie: It just does, okay, deal with it.  
  
Red XIII: ::pouts unsatisfied::  
  
Vincent: ::looking up to notice the audience, Red XIII and Yuffie:: You two have been there the whole time haven't you?  
  
Red XIII: Well we never left.  
  
Yuffie: We just got different seats.  
  
Tifa: ::grabing her hair and massaging her temples:: okay, this is all kind of a load. I need to just let this sink in, I need to just be alone right now... ::Tifa wanders off in a sort of Ophelia*(think Hamlet) like crazed trance.  
  
Aeris: ::She ponders to her self for a moment, her face then lights up all in a single spark:: Oh! I have the best idea!  
  
::She grabs Vincent by the arm, nearly launching him and tugging his limb from it's socket::  
  
Aeris: Come on, you and I need to go gossip, we can talk about boys! ::she runs off draggin Vincent close behind her::  
  
::Cloud stands alone... He takes a moment to contemplate what actually just took place, then looks over his shoulder::  
  
Red XIII: Yeah, we're still here.  
  
Yuffie: That was lame, I wanted blood!  
  
Red XIII: Here. ::he hands Yuffie a pink plastic baseball bat:: leave none standing in the wake of your Technicolor carnage.  
  
::Yuffie bats Red XIII on the head with the bat, not hard but just enough to create a loud BOMP noise of sorts::  
  
Yuffie: You know, that was a lot of fun. And, it was the weirdest thing, I got this warm fuzzy feeling when I did it.  
  
Red XIII: Evil Child.  
  
Yuffie: How'd you like to get neutered kitty kitty...  
  
Red XIII: Would you like to live to see adulthood?  
  
::Suddenly Sephiroth lands between them from the sky::  
  
Sephiroth: Enough! Both of you just shut up!  
  
Red XIII: ...  
  
Yuffie: ... ::She bats Red XIII over the head with the bat again::  
  
Red XIII: Hey! Little brat!  
  
Yuffie: Hey he talked first, aren't you gonna zap him or something, wasn't that the game?  
  
Sephiroth: Child, you are truly evil.  
  
Red XIII: I like to refer to her as Satan's unwanted spawn.  
  
Yuffie: And I'd like to refer you to a psychiatric care ward, but they don't take pets.  
  
::Red XIII pounces at Yuffie but misses before attacking her as she is pulled to safety by the lightning fast reflexes of Sephiroth::  
  
Red XIII: Hey, why'd you do that? ::looking up at the floating Sephiroth over head with Yuffie::  
  
Sephiroth: ::While holding Yuffie about 100 ft in air:: I only need one of you.  
  
::Yuffie sticks her tongue out at Red XIII::  
  
Yuffie: Thbbbbt! Ha! I'm needed! ::she pauses for a moment to ponder what she has just said, then turns back to Sephiroth:: What exactly am I needed for again?  
  
Sephiroth: I have some questions...  
  
Yuffie: Okay... a little vague...  
  
Sephiroth: ...about Cloud ::he blushes::  
  
Yuffie: What more do you want to know about Cloud? Geez, I'd think you'd know him better than me with your guys' past and everything. I mean are you gonna try and take him down or something? ::She suddenly notices a bright red Sephiroth with the most flustered expression she had ever imagined on the evil genius' face::  
  
Sephiroth: You see I uh...  
  
Yuffie: Oh I don't think I want to hear this...  
  
Red XIII: ::Still on the ground:: Me neither, I'm gonna go find something more exciting to do, like have Barret shoot my leg...::He walks off in a cynical sort of demeanor::  
  
Author Note: Alright, that's this chapter, not really sure whats in store next, but then I never really am. I have so idea's I want to try out with ole Sephy though, we'll see what rolls... Keep the reviews commin! 


	6. Update

Alright so this post is strictly for informative reasons, why you might ask, well mainly because of some idiot reviewers that just plain don't get a couple things. Point 1, I write my stories in script/ dialogue format, if you don't like, don't read them. Point 2, if anything in any of my stories personally offends you. you're a complete and total freak'n moron ( ( ). Point 3, this is fun for me, I don't givve a damm abuut spel chek ;). Point 4, my last one, if your name is something on the order of aeon prin. you know who you, I have just two words for you in regards to my stories, F*ck off. That's it, just wanted to post the idea that I write for fun, yes, I enjoy it, and that's about the only reason why. So in short, thanks again for the reviews everyone, good and bad ones. (yes I can take the criticism. 


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